prologue

Name: Sajeetha
life is for living, need i say more?

*loves:
the family, him, them; my friends
anything arty farty, the literary arts, theatre
dolphins
travelling, always unfolding something new
dining in places with ambience to kill for (it's a hobby.hah)
r etail therapy
all things indian
enlightening conversations
candles
angels, fairie,pixies, gnomes, smurfs(br>

*loathes:
the one who stabs u in ur back
death of dear ones
all that flies or has wings
the complications of all types of relationships
not knowing
those who try so hard to be me

red/purple crumpler bag
new urban male jersey
new birks
that oh-so-gorgeous watch from esprit
that beautiful converse bag
a white i-pod nano
that new dgital camera which screams buy-me!
the bikini from billabong
a new pair of funky spectacles
truckloads of best-selling novels
a whole new art materials collection
a new wallet that fits the enormous card collection of mine

nady,the sweetie pie
vicky, the blur sotong
charlotte,the doctor in the making
sivanes, the smart-ass cuzzin
LV, the gorgeous pearly
sarah, the clubbing chica
sujatha, the indian actress look alike
nadia ameera, the lost pri sch mate who was found
lynette, the sports fanatic
hemma, the evil twin
vanessa, popular for all the wrong reasons

express

 

Foto Decadent
 

July 2005[x] August 2005[x] September 2005[x] October 2005[x] November 2005[x] December 2005[x] February 2006[x] March 2006[x] April 2006[x] May 2006[x] June 2006[x] July 2006[x] August 2006[x] September 2006[x] October 2006[x] November 2006[x] December 2006[x] January 2007[x]

phew! i've finally gotten some time in my hands to blog. i really need some time, even if it's a few minutes, to do my own personal stuffs, blogging included. heh.

let's see. last friday was so much fun. the sim gang had planned a post-birthday lunch for me, in the name of shopping but unfortunately, only jeanette, hongyan, lynette and myself cld make it. i mean, how cld i not? i was the VIP anyway, wasn't i lynette? hehe. nevertheless it was such a fun-filled day. i thought i was THE shopping queen but on friday, i realised i wasn't anywhere close as compared to lynn! and the highlight of the day? the birthday presents! wld you believe it if i told you that these gundus wrapped the presents in between a PAD? yes, a PAD, those that females use when they menstruate. i am 100% sure that it's solely lynette's idea! i was so shocked when i saw it, you have no idea how much. surely a memorable birthday. haha.

and the MANICURE session! i think i was the only one among the 3 who has ever had a manicure done and answering their most clueless questions abt it was hilarious. if only hongyan and lynn had more time to spare, all of us cld have gotten one done. jean's was as pretty as mine. hee! i truly had a wonderful time that friday. i take back my words. i love sim and i'm gonna miss every single thing abt it, especially the people when i leave but i do hope the bond that we have fostered over these 2 years will be here to stay. especially with hongyan and lynn. i mean we all know i'm closest to the two. and u both, if you are reading this entry - I DO NOT HATE JEANETTE! -

i am waiting for another outing with the gang in october, during the 3 week study break. i've been wanting to go to either 1, rochester or giraffe for a long, long time and what cld be better than going with a bunch of monkeys? hehe. well, so much for a friday.

saturday was mostly spent at home, except for the morning and the earlier part of the afternoon where i was over at guna's place. his aunt had asked me to fetch her kids (2 of them, a boy and a girl) from her place and bring them over to guna's place to baby-sit them for a few hours since she had to attend to an emergency, which i apprently did. guna's aunt just lived a few blocks away from him so i met the kids below their block at 10am, bought breakfast from macdonalds for them, guna and myself afterwhich we walked to his house. the mum had passed an extra key to me the day before, so we had no problem going in. guna's parents were at work and he was still asleep. not wanting to disturb him i got the kids to settle down and made sure they finished their breakfast when i got a call from guna. this was so funny - he said the usual good morning and went on to ask me where i was. i told him to come out from his room and yes, he was pleasantly surprised. we had breakfast together while the kids watched tv. after breakfast, the kids wanted to play monopoly so i joined them while he went to continue with his assignment. when the kids got tired of monopoly, i got them to do their homework, helping them along the way when his mum came back from work. we chatted for awhile, had lunch and i took my leave shortly.

it was such a simple day yet it just felt so good. it felt like we were married and in 5-10 years time, this will probably be what we'll be doing but i didn't let my thoughts run wild. i've learnt from my first relationsip never to plan or build dreams in advance cos if they don't materialise, all you'll feel is heartbreak so i stopped myself from wishing for anything. i was contented with today and today is all i'm willing myself to dream about.

well, sunday was yet another beautiful day spent with him. the plan to meet was rather random and sudden since it has never been a habit for us to meet on sundays for i've strictly allocated it for my family and family alone. he knows it too but i guess this had a purpose. the night before, on saturday, he messaged to ask if i would like to follow him for the 'RASF Open House'. rather interesting. i've always wanted to watch the ariel displays, where the pliots perform some stunts with their planes but never got a chance to so this was really tempting and knowing guna's passion for the 'metallic birds', i knew my presence wld mean a great deal. so i said yes.

and i'm glad that i did cos it was so educational and entertaining. this was definitely out of the normal range of activities i usually did and i didn't think i would have loved it as much as i really did. the weather was terrible and there were a whole lot of people squashed into that air base yet i didn't feel like leaving at all. the noise, crowd and heat only added to the excitement. i took a lot of pictures but not with the pilots or a specific plane simply because the queue was so damn long. oh well, at least i had fun. that's the ultimate issue for me.

after the open house that day, i learnt alot about guna's work and his job scope. i learnt the fundamentals of being an aviation specialist. that's his vocation and trust me, it's not all that easy. now i'm able to understand why he always says he's tired, why he needs to get his 8-9 hours of sleep, why he hangs up on me earlier, why he seems spaced out most of the weekdays, why he's so dark these days (mean, i know but it's the truth), why he seems grouchy and irritable certain times, why he snaps for no reason at all and why he's always busy. if only he had explained it to me earlier, i wld have empathised with his situation. i wld have realised that he did all that he did not because he wanted to but simply because he had to. but i'm glad i got to know it at least now. as they say, it's better late then never right? now, i am able to appreciate the things he does for me, much more. he doesn't have to meet me on weekdays, after work when he cld go home and rest yet he does. he doesn't need to send me to the mrt station after tuition though it's only 6 minutes away from the kid's place and even if he does come, it's only going to be for a good 15 min cos i'll have to be home yet he does. he doesn't have to but he does. to him, seeing me for that mere 15 min was important. earlier, it didn't make sense but now it does. i cld go on listing a few more examples but i'm sure it'll bore you so i'll stop. but the real issue here is - i was so keen on wanting to see big changes, surprises and appreciation that i became ignorant to the smaller ones. the ones that really mattered. the ones that really had value. the ones that contained the subtlety of love.

i love him. really.
and i feel really bad for saying all the things i've said to him in a fit of anger before.
i was so unappreciative yet i kept complaining that he never appreciated me or my presence.
i whined that he never took the efforts to make me feel important when all along, it was me who reagarded him as unimportant.
shame on me.

the trip on sunday opened my eyes big.
and big they'll remain.
and for my readers, here's a word of advice; never disregard the little gestures or actions of a loved one for they might have so much of love embedded in them. you just never knew. look harder, you might not be able to see it but u will feel it...

think abt this - you have a boyfriend who buys you roses everyday, bring you to posh restaurants for dinner, buys you expensive presents but at the end of the day, you find out he's been cheating you with your best friend?
on the other hand, you have a boyfriend who is always busy with work, has not much time for you, doesn't always surprise you, buys you expensive gifts or brings you to expensive restaurants for dinner but you are his world..

which is your pick?
you decide.
it's your life after all.

much love, sajeetha.

Tuesday, September 05, 2006
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