Wednesday, August 30, 2006
am in my dad's car as i type this entry. yes, i bring my laptop almost everywhere these days. it has become an integral part of my life since i have got assignments up to my neck. we're on our way for dinner actually and i thought i might as well use this opportunity to blog since i'm not at all motivated to start on the next assignment. haha.
did i mention that i love morning lectures? it gives me ample time to my own things for the rest of that day and that is precisely why i attended the morning lecture for 'ethics and governance' today. it is my second time and i'm thinking of making it a weekly affair. and i love my marketing group members who are from the 'A' class, which means i have company and this makes it all the more easier to decide. claire, a fellow friend totally reminds me of lynette except tt lynette is funy in a 'digusting sorta' way when she opens her big mouth to show us her half chewed food (if you're going eeeewwww, let me tell you that there's more but i'd rather spare you the details. haha) and claire is funny in a peverse sorta way. pls don't ask me for examples, i was laughing the whole of lecture today.
anyway, school's been great so far. leadership & mgt assignment is due this friday and 99% of it has been done. this is the very first time, in my 2 years of school that we've finished an assignment way ahead of submission day. i'm so proud of ourselves. human resource is well on the way, revision for marketing quiz/test has been started though not quite intensive but i'm sure i'll catch up and i've pretty much successfully kept to the schedule i've written for the whole month. i ought to give myself a pat on the back *grinz*
as for my exercise regime, i'm still sticking to it. can't believe it myself but yes. i've hit the gym twice this week and went for a good swim last night and trust me, i've never felt better and i've come to a point where i don't really care if i'm fat anymore but what's more important is that i feel good and am healthy. of course, it would be a bonus if i shed some pounds here and there but this is me, and i'm comfortable with who i am. i wonder what brought about this change. i feel like i'm finally living my life to the fullest cos i'm always running around, doing something, teaching someone, reading up on something and that gives me this strange sense of self-satisfaction but when the going gets tougher, there are times i wish i could lessen the pace and stop to smell the flowers. hmmm, oh well i'll take it as it comes. for now, life is good.
i went to do some shopping after school today. ok, it's not really shopping but rather collect a lot of free stuff from various places cos i received vouchers from all over for my birthday and i hadn't redeemed them yet. it was already the 30th and the vouchers were only valid for the month of august so i thought i might as well do some running ard today. i got myself a body butter and a vitamin e eye cream from the body shop at just $15! what a steal! the usual would have been $60! and a nice pendent from perlini's silver, discounted at 50%, two outfitter tops at only $25 when it's actually supposed to be $50, a white denim skirt (which i was looking all over singapore for and finally found it) at $25 with the money mum gave me for my birthday and along the way, got guna 2 t-shirts as well! i was about to go down to west mall, to get my new pair of specs done when mum called to ask if i was joining them for dinner so i have it left it for tomorrow. yay! it was so fun and i did this all alone, by myself. some me-time sure is good, every once in a while!
tomorrow is yet another day. a long one since classes are from 7-10 and i have got a tuition before that BUT it's also the last day of the week for me! yay! how fast time flies eh? it seemed like monday only yesterday. soon before i know it, it'll be the exams and finally the holidays! that's not so bad after all, is it?
i better be off now. need to catch up on some reading. till, i see ya again muacks!
Wednesday, August 30, 2006
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Tuesday, August 29, 2006
- and this, on sunday at sentosa. u can see that we were on an animal hunt, right? of all things, that! -
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
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- alright, time for bloopers. we had no idea this was bring taken and we all look like we're ready for a fight. and see how aunty-like i look? my, my! -
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
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- u didn't know? we're just witches and wizards in disguise. they call us the charming ones. hahah. lame -
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
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- and yes, even the adults join in the fun at times. i told you we were a crazy bunch! -
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
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- with some of the gentlemen of the renga's clan. and the beautiful sunflower is from my cousin seated next to me. he's the sweetest -
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
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- and this, with my crrraaazzzyyy family whom i adore to bits! -
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
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- love conquers all. true indeed -
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
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- this was taken during lunch with radhiyah and diyana -
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
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- this was an accidental shot cos we forgot to unzoom the camera, yet there is something very artsy abt this pic. i like -
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
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- the two precious ones who made the birthday worthwhile. thank you -
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
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- not many will understand the bond we share. him, i love in ways more than one and for reasons more than hundreds. senthil and myself -
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
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- i thought this looked lovely. over at the steamboat restaurant, perched at the top of the hills at mt.faber -
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
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- this i have to post. i hope u know how much u mean to me -
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
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Monday, August 28, 2006
and the hype's all over now. i have finally turned 22 and something abt what wicky boy said to me on my birthday rings so true. after this, noone will really care abt my age anymore cos i belong to the "life after 21" clan. offically a real adult. haha, funny the way he puts it but still true after all. a year older, a year wiser they say. is it? trust me, i still feel 18. makes no difference that i'm 22 now. maybe just more responsibilites and constant questioning by family members if i've a boyfriend cos they're all afraid i'll be left on the shelf. fret not. i've already found my mister right.i think.
anyway, i thought i HAD to blog about how my birthday came along cos this was probably one of the best birthdays i've ever had in a long while.
on friday (eve of birthday):
vicky had made plans with me, like what i mentioned in the earlier entry of my blog. met her at 1pm at marina square for a little shopping afterwhich we headed bk to my place for a quick shower and a change before heading for the 'surprise dinner'. i knew we were gg for dinner but had no idea where. this was really exciting. i felt like one of the hardy boys, unconvering some secret. haha. the woman made me alight at outram park station so i naturally thought we were going to 'Giraffe" the new restaurant opposite PS cos i've been wanting to go there ever-since god knows when but no, i was wrong. we boarded the train at the opposite side and this leaves us with only one place to go - harbour front. but i was wrong again. upon reaching harbour front, vicky flagged a cab, made me stand outside while she whispered something to the taxi driver (of course, i was trying very hard not to eavesdrop) and finally, made me get into the cab. the funny part was that the moment i got into it, the taxi uncle actually asked in the most unglamorous manner " but mount faber only got one restaurant what? u know the way, can show me or not?' oooooo, so we were going to mount faber for dinner! i had no idea they had restaurants there. i've never even been to mt.faber before but heard that it has one of the nicest breathtaking scenic views. anyway, coming back to the cab ride, vicky was so irritated with the uncle, she was like "thanks ah uncle, thanks. thank you so much la!" cos he just spoiled the surprise. it was so damn hilarious, i tell you! vicky, vicky, have i told you that you're such a cuckoo. haha.
as we reached the designated place, i was so taken aback by the beautiful ambience of the place. it was so my-type of thing. and if this surprise wasn't enough, i had another pleasant shock waiting for me. no prizes for guessing who was already there, waiting for us. yes, it was senthil!!!!!!! the two gundus had pre-planned this surprise together all along and i had not a single clue abt it. indeed, i was surprised. seeing senthil brought about a whole new set of feeling. no, don't get me wrong. it was not overwhelming love or anything but something very hard to describe. you know the calming and soothing sorta feeling? yea, that was what i felt. seeing him always made me feel good and that day was no different.the effects senthil has on me, they'll never change. he has come to be an integral part of my life, more than a friend, ex boyfriend. he is my best friend. who else wld know me better than him?
dinner was amazing. there were awkward silences in btw but it was nevertheless amazing. at some point, i kept asking myself why we had to be what we were now? here he was, that one man i truly loved like crazy , now as an ex boyfriend who belonged to another. why me? why me? why did i have to go through all this heartaches and start all over again with someone else? why do we have to be contented with just being friends? why did the 5 yr come to an end when we still cared for one another so deeply? sigh... so many question, none answered. either way, i was glad that together or not, we still had it in our hearts to share special occasions with one another like old times.
there were times when i was still together with senthil, we wld talk abt how we'd be if we ever broke up and i always told him that i wished we'll be friends, still there for one another and not be like those typical couples out there who hate one another, bitch abt their ex-partners and walk away when they meet on the streets. and he, had always promised me that we'll be friends and still be involved on one another's lives and yes, he kept it. i'm just thankful that we have what we have. thank you senthil, for then and now. i love you. yes, i do. just in different ways now.
and vicky, i have probably said this to you a million times, but you're the best. you don't know how much friday meant to me and having senthil ard was probably the best thing you cld have ever done for me. and i also know how money doesn't come easy to you since you're still a student and are not working and the allowance that your parents give is hardly enough for your own expenses yet you did so much for me. i love you and for return, i have only my friendship to extend to you. with a lifetime warranty. i hope that's enough. big, big hug!
on saturday (the actual day of the birthday):
my poly besties radhiyah and diyana had made plans for lunch at fish & co, parkmall. as lunch we had. it was so much fun and lots of talk. though we're all in sim, we hardly see one another in school and my birthday lunch made up for all the absence. it's only during these occasions that you know who your true friends are and who are those who really care. i don't know about you but i have learnt alot from this one birthay. those who'll go the extra mile for you and those who call themselves friends just for the convenice of it. rads and di, we may not always meet because of the different lifestyles we lead but we all know we mean the world to one another, don't we? thank you guys for that wonderful day out. love, love.
dinner was, undoubtedly with the family. it has been a lifetime norm and will always be. it was cccrrrraazzzy! so much of fun and i'm really blessed to have such a wonderful set of parents, lovely sister, awesome uncles and aunties and absolutely wacky cousins! what more can i want, you tell me?
on sunday (post birthday outing with the bf):
i so wanna write that it was the best day out of all the three but in actual fact it wasn't. and that hurts. maybe it shouldn't but because i expected a lot, it does. i wonder if this sunday wld have even happened if i didn't cry my eyes out on friday that he didn't even care abt my birthday. he did take the effort to bring me out but really, it didn't matter anymore. he wasn't even the first one to wish me 'happy birthday' and to me, small things like this matters a great deal. yes, i'm that anal about stuff. with senthil, such things were a norm and we both knew what was expected of us but in this r'ship, nothing is the same anymore. i thought things like these were unspoken norms but i thought wrong. sigh. the problem with this r'ship is that i'm too sensitive and live in a fairytale land while he, is too practical. so practical to an extent, i think he's made of steel.
guna thinks that as long as a man doesn't hit his wife/gf, doesn't cheat, doesn't hurl vulgarities he's a perfect husband or boyfriend but to me that's not the case. yes, whatever he says is true to an extent but don't all women want to be pampered, surprised and loved a little more once in a while? where is the passion? by passion, i don't mean sex. i mean, passion in the r'ship? it clearly doesn't exist in ours and that's sad. i'm happy with guna, i don't deny that but i just wish he'll take a little more effort in pleasing me.. it's just a wish. sigh.
maybe it's my fault to think that boyfriends are supposed to come up with the best birthday surprises. it's my own set of rules. whoever said everyone had to adhere to it. i guess it's just my fault or maybe, i've just been too spoilt by senthil. it's funny, really. senthil was everything i wanted in a man (in the romantic sense) but he has cheated me, hit me and hurt me too many a time which led to the final break down of our r'ship while guna, who has never done anyone of those mentioned is being criticised for not being romantic when i'm supposed to be glad. nothing's ever enough, is it? that's life isn't it? it's not always perfect and you don't always get what you want.
oh well. the birthday is over anyway. no point crying over spilt milk. at least, i have good friends and a wonderful family. that's more than enough. and lynette, u completed the beautiful day with your birthday wishes. thank you dear friend. you don't know how much that means.
with this, i'll return to slumberland to wake up to a brighter tommorrow as a 22 yr old. good night.
Monday, August 28, 2006
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Thursday, August 24, 2006
phew! that was a busy week! not that it's not normal, but it has been busier than busy and i'm really relieved it's the end of the week! for me at least, since i officially do not have classes on fridays.
hmm, in the midst of stress i can't really remember what's taken place the last few days. my mind's in a fuzz, all cloudy and unable to generate any thoughts at all. i'm thinking my brain has collapsed. hah. exaggerated, i can be.
nothing much has happened except that now i've got one tuition kid lesser to teach. yep, i've dropped one and am left with three more. am intending to drop another and just stick with 2 kids. i'm sick of running ard all over singapore, trying to educate kids for a rather meagre amount of money. teaching kids from indian familes can be very taxing - they NEVER pay on time. well, at least most of them. trust me, i know. furthermore, i really need to concentrate on my academics. what dad said to me on tuesday, while dropping me off for tuition made a hell lot of sense - " i don't see why you're exhausting yourself, running from one corner to another, using up your precious time teaching tuition for a small sum of money and neglecting your studies, which is going to present you with a degree that will bring in money worth thousands. why compromise a rather important part of your life for a small exchange?"
no, i am a disciplined student in case you thought otherwise. i attend 90% of all my lectures unless there is a dire need to do otherwise. i do everything that is required of me and am motivated to study but what dad means is that attending school alone isn't enough. slogging like mad during assignments alone isn't sufficient. what he thinks i need to do is, revise consistently every day after school. you know, self study? which apparently, i'm not in a state to do because of my tight schedule. i thought about it long and hard. he made perfect sense. he always does anyway and thus the reason of terminating the tuition.
this month's one helluva month. 3 assignments due, a quiz and a test. leadership and management is sorta completed so that leaves me with marketing and human resource. marketing too is well on the way of completion and so this leaves me with human resource. it's time to work on that. the quiz, i've told myself that i'll start studying on monday and the test, that'll too be done. at least i've done some planning and i think that's quite ok for a start. now the challenge is in sticking by it. i can do that. i think. hah.
anyway, enough abt sch. my r'ship has been rather rocky the past few days. i dun even know where to start. sigh.. i think growing up is really hard to do. i try and tell myself that it'll blow over soon and i will be able to accept certain things in life but i just can't seem to. it really doesn't help when the both of us are so damn busy. argh. it's like he's never there when i need him cos he's so absorbed in his work and studies. i'm busy too but why is it that i always manage to spare some time for you? i feel so unimportant. i know i'm not supposed to feel that way and it's not true at all but you know, sometimes you just can't help it. i'm trying, really hard to understand but it's not going anywhere....
to think i'm not even seeing you on my birthday! and you don't even find it necessary to see me a day earlier. and you say i'm important, yea right! actions speak louder than words mister, in case you haven't realised. it's alright.. in time to come, i probably won't even care anymore if special occasions are spent with you or not. after all, you're too BUSY even for yourself. i swear even the president isn't half as busy as you but then again i forgot. you're the president's secretary aren't you since secretaries are always busier than the bosses. whatever.
vicky, thank you for making a date out with me on friday. at least i'm important to someone. what wld i do without you? maybe, we should get attached? what do you think? it'll make life alot more easier to live..
and kamini, come back soon! we need some of your 'ragale' to get us through the day!
sigh....
Thursday, August 24, 2006
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Saturday, August 19, 2006
i was doing some general reading about several successful leaders, and Steve Jobs (CEO of Apple & Pixar) story inspired me so much so that i decided to share a few lines of his story with you.
An excerpt of an incredibly inspiring speech by him delivered to graduates of Stansford University on June 12, 2005 -
" When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: "If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you'll most certainly be right." It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: "If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?" And whenever the answer has been "No" for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.
Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything – all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.
About a year ago I was diagnosed with cancer. I had a scan at 7:30 in the morning, and it clearly showed a tumor on my pancreas. I didn't even know what a pancreas was. The doctors told me this was almost certainly a type of cancer that is incurable, and that I should expect to live no longer than three to six months. My doctor advised me to go home and get my affairs in order, which is doctor's code for 'prepare to die'. It means, to try to tell your kids everything you thought you'd have the next 10 years to tell them in just a few months. It means, to make sure everything is buttoned up so that it will be as easy as possible for your family. It means, to say your goodbyes.
I lived with that diagnosis all day. Later that evening I had a biopsy, where they stuck an endoscope down my throat, through my stomach and into my intestines, put a needle into my pancreas and got a few cells from the tumor. I was sedated, but my wife, who was there, told me that when they viewed the cells under a microscope the doctors started crying because it turned out to be a very rare form of pancreatic cancer that is curable with surgery. I had the surgery and I'm fine now.
This was the closest I've been to facing death, and I hope its the closest I get for a few more decades. Having lived through it, I can now say this to you with a bit more certainty than when death was a useful but purely intellectual concept: No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don't want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because death is very likely the single best invention of life. It is life's change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true.
Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary."
with this, i shall end today's entry. i certainly hope it has made u think a little more about your life and helped you to view it in a different light altogether. remember, life ain't a rehearsal. get it right the first time.
have a blessed weekend ahead friends. love.
Saturday, August 19, 2006
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Friday, August 18, 2006
i.hate.school.
i.hate.everything.and.everyone.ard.me.in.sim.
i.cannot.wait.to.get.out.of.that.rather.screwed.up.place.with.all.that
.filth.
Friday, August 18, 2006
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- thank you for the shoulders,really. meant a great deal -
Friday, August 18, 2006
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- this is after the movie. can u see the differences in the eye? after all that crying -
Friday, August 18, 2006
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- this was in the theatre, during the movie. still so chirpy and yes, got time to take pictures one. haha -
Friday, August 18, 2006
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- this was before the movie, all smiles -
Friday, August 18, 2006
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- karan' johar's best; kabhi alvida naa kehna starring shah rukh, abishek, rani, preity and amitabh -
Friday, August 18, 2006
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16.08.2006
classes were cancelled for tt day but i still had to go down to school to promote my council's bash. at 11am, clad in an artist's costume, i was parading ard the sim canteen, distributing fliers with my fellow council-mates who were dressed as nurses, stewardess, pilot, chef, char siew seller, phua chu kang, loanshark, ah-beng, tennis player, badminton player and every other occupation u can think of. it doesn't take a genuis to figure out what the theme for the bash is - yep, it's occupation. last year was 'nerdational day' and boy, was it a huge success. this year's is held in zouk and unfortunately, i will not be able to go for it since mum had bought tickets for the 'rythym kollywood' concert, the very same day. nevertheless, i am sure the council's gonna make the bash a blast. good luck, you guys!
and after that, i had a movie date with vicky. yep, the ever famous karan johar's kabhi alvida naa kehna'. i was really looking forward to catching that movie and it had me all hyped up and ready. 'KANK' is a practical, forbidden, inevitable love story set in the ever-mesmerizing new york city. love has no boundaries, limits... or does it? as the movie suggests, what if there comes a love that broke all other relationships? can there be? what if married man falls in love with a already married woman? what if they realised that their previous relationship was never meant to be in the first place but realised it too late? then what happens? do you step back and let ur true love walk away, or do you follow the path your heart takes you to?
the movie starred amazing actors and actresses like shah rukh kahn, rani mukherjee, preity zinta, abishek batchaan and the everfamous amitabh batchaan. shah rukh plays a soccer player who was waiting to sign a 5 million dollar contract, and was at the peak of his career. he was married to his collegemate, preity and they had a son. preity is a rather career-minded, modern, independent woman.
rani was married to abishek, her childhood buddy. they led a normal, happy life but one which lacked passion. they do not have kids as rani can't conceive.
shahrukh meets rani at her wedding, when she was having the jitters about the whole thing. she tells him that she loves her fiance, but not in the way she was supposed to. she asks sharukh, what if she finds her true love after she's married. what happens, then? shahrukh simply advices her to get married. as he leaves the place, he meets with an accident which leaves him partially crippled. this destroys his soccer career and leaves him to becoming a house-husband while preity assumes the role of the 'man' in the house.
4 years pass and the two of them meet again. rani and shah rukh. they both find out that both their marriages were not a bed-of-roses and was at the verge of failing. they then, decided to help each other out to help save their marriages and a series of attempts to strengthen the marriage takes place. but in the event, things take a turn and they realise they're in love with one another. they try to discard the feelings, to walk away and stop all form of contact but fail. the affair continues while things at home, at both sides becomes worse. issues with the spouses keeps escalating and this only made the affair stronger, to the extent where physical intimacy was considered.
after a lot of drama (all of which were logical and very reasonable), they finally decide to part and give their marriages a second chance. obviously their spouses didn't take the truth very well. it led to the final breakdown of both marriages. shah rukh, leaves his home to stay elsewhere. rani, leaves new york and settles down in another state. 3 years later, abishek meets rani and they talk. all's been forgiven and forgotten and abishek was getting married to someone else. he wanted rani to be his bridesmaid, for he had no family. she was all he had. she agreed.
at the wedding, preity happened to be there. both preity and rani, had a confrontation for the first time but it ended well with preity telling rani to go and find shahrukh, and lead their lives for they had separated a long time ago. both abishek and preity, help her to find her true love. and they lived happily ever after. this, is the summarized version of the story.
but i, on the other hand was not at all pleased with the end. after all, i am a conservative, indian girl. i do not condone cheating. never.ever. period. and whoever said that you can cheat your wive and husband and still get what you want and live without any form of regret and guilt. that does not happen in real life and with people like me ard, it'll never happen. i understood why both rani and shahrukh fell out of their marriages and the reasons as to why they had the affair. after all, god did give us that one thing that even he can't control -our heart. the feelings that come together with it. but still, cheating? no way.
but people, why do i say it's the best film ever? why do i beg you to watch it, even my non-indian friends? simply because the issues they bring out in the movie, WILL at one point or another relate to you, your life and your relationship. it will let you understand a lot of things in a different light. it will make you re-think abt alot of your tightly held principles. you need to know the reasons why each of the couples' marriage failed. you need to know what made the two fall in love with one another, seek solace in one another. what drove them to the arms of another man and woman.
the actors were amazing. rani is gorgeous. she made me wanna wear sari all day-long. only she can carry it, that well. shah rukh, was needless to say. he's a gifted actor. amitabh batchan is a natural. i thought this was one of abishek's best. and preity, she was so in character. great movie, great actors.great songs, great cinematography. everything about the movie was a thumbs up. but of course if you're thinking of watching it, don't forget to being a packet of tissue along. you will definitely need it.
and vicky, thanks for being there to wipe my tears away when i needed you. thank you for lending me your shoulders to cry on. literally.
-kabhi alvida naa kehna (never say goodbye) -
p/s: for my non-indian friends who want to catch it, you can get the tickets at GV Yishun, GV Tampines, GV Bishan and GV Jurong Point. i'd really recommend you to watch it, if you're the open to all new things type of person. you won't regret it, i promise.
Friday, August 18, 2006
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Tuesday, August 15, 2006
- that's my darling chen hanwei but i doubt u can see him. but i just had to posti it up man! -
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
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- a little summary of what we ate, drank and where we sat! -
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
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- the girlfriend and her boyfriend -
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
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- argh, my fat fat arms! ok, i'll stop sounding like a bimbo! the boyfriend and mua! heh! -
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
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- i thought this was an awesome shot by raji. guna was trying to get me to take a picture, and i was like " don't la", with so much of drama and she captured it perfectly. i just had to show you what a natural i am. muahahahah! -
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
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- see the 3 cuckoos? i was gonna take the desserts and they had to show their silly faces. oh, it was ben's idea by the way! men! -
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
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- there is something abt this picture that i like but i dunno what -
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
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- the happy family shot -
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
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Monday, August 14, 2006
this was taken at ngee ann poly, after anitha's performance. yes, yes all clad in traditional wear, ready to kill. haha!
Monday, August 14, 2006
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Saturday was NPICS's annual indian all art competition's song song semis. For some of you who are familiar with it, it's called "aarathanaa' and though i was an alumni member of NPICS and was cordially invited to the event, i was really half-hearted about going. it's been quite some time since i had actually gotten involved in their activites due to the packed lifestyle and i seriously lost touch with alot of what was going on in there and going back on saturday was going to be really awkward. i don't even know half of the new members!
but then anitha was taking part in the competition, representing NIE and was nervous about being there all alone so i though i should be there to show her my support. after all, she did keep asking what time i was going to be there. so reluctantly, i went.
anitha was amazing. in both the solo and duet category. i mean, come on. she's a singer on vasantham central's tamil variety shows - it'll be ridiculous if she didn't get through to the finals. and just as i had expected, she qualified for the next round which will be held on september the 9th. on the other hand, i strongly believe that professional singers like anitha, should not be allowed to participate in competitions like these as they have an advantage over the others and the fact that the judges would be fellow singers from vasantham and her friends, would make the ultimate decision a baised one if they don't act in an ethical way, of course!
hmmm, something to think abt now.
anyway, i left home the moment anitha's turn was over to get dressed for my double dinner date out with one of my good friend raji and her bf, ben. dinner was at 'tapas tree' in clarke quay and boy was it sinful! and of course, accompanied by alot of catching up, the boyfriends bonding, weird story exchanges, jokes, photo taking sessions and more.
it has beena good 6 mths since i met up with raji. the last time was on christmas last year. it was really goos seeing her and i thought she looked really gorgeous last night. she's always been a pretty thing but something about her yesterday, made her look ravishing. as for ben, you dun have to say it. he's always been a cutie and when i say cute, i don't mean the 'hot' cute. instead i mean the 'chipmunk' cute. hey, that's a compliment, mind you! they've been together for a good 5 years and at dinner last night, when they were talking about marriage i couldn't help but wonder if senthil and myself would be discussing the same stuff as they were, had we not broken up. sigh. somethings ever change. like being reminded of him, every now and then.
anyway, did i mention that both raji and i have concluded that younger men are really sweet as compared to men our age or slightly older than us? and both the boyfriends have since agreed that older women take better care of their men! haha, it's really strange how this is coming from me, of all people. i used to be totally against this younger men, older women thingy but after guna, i've decided it's really not that bad after all. but being with older men, also has its advantages. at the end of the day, it's all a matter of what you want at the end of the day.
in case, you're wondering why raji agrees with me too, that's cos ben's a year younger then her. he's 23, while she's 24 and i'm 22 while guna's 21. another strange coincidence; both our boyfriends are regulars in the air force, both aviation specialists and we're all ex-students of ngee ann polytechnic. haha! i never knew raji from school though. i got to know her when we were both teachers in s student-care centre a year and a hlaf back, so technically she's actually my ex-colleague.
anyway, the double date thingy turned out much better than expected and both the boyfriends clicked almost instantaneouly. to think i was afraid they'll keep quite the entire night and we girls had to do all the talking. never did that happen. hah. that was a splendid idea by raji and i'm sure we'll have more of such outings. double dates, can turn out fun with the right people! but definitely not with copy cats like that moron whom i mentioned in my precious entry!
oh, let's not talk abt her. i'm in a happy mood, shall not spoil it. anyway, did i tell you that i saw chen hanwei that night? as we walked down clarke quay, we say chen hanwei and ivy lee. they were having a shoot for some upcoming drama serial and i couldn't stop hyperventilating the moment i saw him. i loved him ever since i was 9 and the love continues... *swoon* last week, guna and i saw edmund chen and ivy lee at esplande, they too were having the same shoot. i'm guessing it's for the same serial. hmm, maybe i should go down again this saturday and wait for my darling chen hanwei! haha!
k peeps, i'm getting tired already. shall post up pictures for ya'll to see. till then, byeeeeee!
Monday, August 14, 2006
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Saturday, August 12, 2006
met up with vicky at little india yesterday. we needed to get some threading done, afterwhich we had a delicious meal at shakunthalas. actually, it kinda defeated the whole purpose of our exercise regime but who cares? food's heaven! hah!
i met guna after i was done with vicky, since he as a test in the air force school yesterday he was released earlier from work. and so we went to catch a movie - my super ex girlfriend, which was SO lame! it really wasn't my cup of tea but yea, like i mentioned if u just have too much of time in your hands, do get tickets for it.
Saturday, August 12, 2006
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- if u are looking for a movie which can make u sleep, or if u have too much of time and money in your hands to waste, pls watch 'my super ex-girlfriend'! -
Saturday, August 12, 2006
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- after the rather lame movie 'my super ex girlfriend', since we were bored to tears we decided to do what we did best! pose! wa lau, i'm turning him to become like me man! tsk, tsk -
Saturday, August 12, 2006
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- our delicious, full indian meal that we had for lunch yesterday at shakunthalas. and u have to try the butter chicken! it's yummy, yummy, yummy. ask vicky, she'll vouch for it. -
Saturday, August 12, 2006
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- when it's a hot, sunny day and u're walking ard town and are finally feeling exhausted, sit down at the stone tables outside far east and cam-whore! yes! -
Saturday, August 12, 2006
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- can u believe it? we actually ran out of poses or rather, the train arrived even before we cld think of more. been ages since we've done some cam-whoring together, dun u think vicky? -
Saturday, August 12, 2006
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Friday, August 11, 2006
arrrgggghhhhh! this is driving me crazy lar!
like really, really crazy!
and no, i am self-declaring that i am NOT petty and childish at all!!
and now, i want u to tell me if i am!
there is this moron, whom i got aquainted with, through guna cos it's one of good friend's girlfriend. the moron is a yr younger than me, had graduated from some ulu ite and is now working in tan tock seng hospital as no, not a nurse u gundu, but a simple ward clerk. this rather annoying moron can't really speak proper english for nuts and her tamil, is similar to that of a donkey's grunts. i'm not joking, i swear. and she address me as 'gal'. yes, that's technically my name from her. i actually don't remember calling me by name at all. i'm digressing,
anyway abt the moron, we met in february for the first time in causeway point, as i was with guna and she with her bf and since all four of us were gg for dinner, guna suggested tt we have it together. and so we did and at first meeting she seemed like a pretty nice girl, despite my desperate attempts at trying to figure out her past and present tenses since they were all mixed up, her was and is, and the famous borrow me and lend me type of english. i wonder why she didn't try speaking to me in tamil. that wld have spared me the pain.
so, as i was saying we left after dinner with a formal goodbye and that was it it. but no, it wasn't. back then, i didn't realise that was going to be the start of all disaster! so listen, called me later tt night (i'm regretful tt my endearing bf does not possess the basic courtesy to ask for my permission before revealing it to random maniacs i meet for barely 5 hours), introduced herself and started yakking for abt an hour. initially, i was quite impressed by her friendliness and so continued on with the conversation. before i knew it, she was spilling her guts to me abt how her bf actually raises his hands on her, how she went for mutiple operations on her jaw and nose and even eye because of his violence, how she has no friends at all for she left everyone of them for him (why do indian girls never learn? such pea-brained asses), how her world only revolves ard him and he doesn't really reciprocate the thoughts and sometimes she feels like she deserves someone better but she doesn't have the heart to leave him and yada, yada, yada..
that was ultimately a culture shock and kinda weird actually. i mean, come on. we got aquainted barely 24 hrs ago and she was, telling me her whole life-story! but of course, me being the nice soul went on to listen to her sob stories (ok fine, i admit! i was a little kaypo! a little bit only ok?) and provided her with some comforting words and hung up. afterwhich of course, i called guna to dictate the entire story. and he was taken aback at the fact his friend was the abusive kind of boyfriend but really, we all know the boyfriend to be a very, very nice guy but then again aren't we all different in a relationship. anyway, coming back to the moron, after that very first call she decided that i was her best friend. she called me EVERY SINGLE DAY (no, i am not exaggerating), smses me, asks my opinion on everything, always organised couple outings which included guna and myself, invited me out for shopping with her and gave me the liberty to pick out her clothes and included me as part of her life. initially, i was quite ok with what she was doing cos i pitied her. pitied her cos she was in a abusive relationship with no friends at all to help her out and i was probably the first friend she had in a long while, and i was just glad to help. but after awhile, it started getting rather annoying. the calls became more frequent and if i had missed any one of them, she becomes paranoid and messages to ask if she's done something wrong to offend me and i'll be forced to reply, she keeps tabs on my friendster updates religiously and calls me immediately if i had a new picture posted up which was followed by a series of questions like 'where did u go, what did u do, how much did it cost you?' and the next moment she'll have a picture with her boyfriend posted up, at the same place i was in, a week back. if that wasn't enough, she started asking me where i got my tops, shades, watches, bags, sandals, heels and then went on to get them and wear them out in the same combination as i did (this isn't very hard to figure out since the moron has a fashion sense similar to that of an kampung aunty). guna and i are adventurous when it comes to food and we love dining out and it's become a hobby these days. upon knowing that, she started doing the same with her boyfriend and called me up to update me on her new eatery. this was getting exasperating, i swear! there is more to comei tell you! see, i have a habit of using the word 'apparently' in btw my sentence rather frequently and last week, when she called i realised that she had used the very word at least 7 times in btw sentences (this too, isn't very difficult to find out cos when a person says things like "apparently, can u borrow me your pen?" you just know they're trying too hard.
the moment i started sensing the 'copycat' signal, i was rather irritated and started complaining abt it to vicky on a daily basis but still managed to keep my cool although my inner feelings did surface once in a while in my msn nicks/random blog entries abt how i hate being copied. the last straw came, when she met guna on the roads last night and showed him her newly coloured hair, exclaming in the most bimbotic tone "hey, see i dyed my hair the same colour as sajeetha!" and when i thought things couldn't get any worse, she just had to prove me wrong! you know, i have a habit of doing up collages with my pictures and putting weird captions/deco on them and posting them up on friendster? she actually tried her hands at that, posted up pictures very similar in her page and actually had the nerves to send me one with our picture, both guna and i! that's it! i have had enough! i was so mad, i cld have slapped her!
seriously, if you ask me where i got my stuffs from and said u loved it and would like to get it as well, i'd be more than willing to help but copying my style and pretending like you were born with such capabilities, that's shallow! i repeat, shallow! and call me petty or ridiculous, childish even i.don't.care! the main point is, the idea is mine and only mine! just, solely mine! and i hate the fact that you try so hard to me and pls, if u're thinking i'm flattered you have thought wrong! i realise from these series of events that u are finding for someone to worship but let me tell you something, i ain't god if that's what u're thinking and i don't wanna be one either! especially, not YOURS!
the war has started.
i.so.fucking.cant.stand.you.
Friday, August 11, 2006
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Thursday, August 10, 2006
- yes, u saw it. we spell double tttrrrroouuubbllleeee -
Thursday, August 10, 2006
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- now really, who'se the beauty and who's the geek? hahahaha -
Thursday, August 10, 2006
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you and me, things seem like they're almost normal btw us yet i know that they aren't.
and i'm sure u feel it too.
u try and be normal and make things feel like how they were used to be but it's just not the
same and i can't help but feel terrible.
if u have decided to let bygones be bygones, to 'forgive' me and let things get back to normal,
i'd just want you to know that i don't want that nor do i need that.
i have got my pride. i have got my dignity.
i'm not going to allow myself to be 'forgiven' for something i never did.
i'm not going to compromise on my principles just so that things will be what they used to be.
i'm not going to get blamed unneccesarily.
at times, i feel that ignorance and avoidance is probably the best way to deal with the matter.
just let things be and pretend that all is fine but my conscience won't allow me to.
cos deep down, no matter how normal you pretend to be, i know that at the back of your heart and mind, you believe that i betrayed you.
and seriously, you think that makes me feel good?
when a friend you held so dear harbours such thoughts about you?
no.
i feel like crap, if that's what you want to know.
sigh.
all i wish is for you to ask me.
confront.
then i can explain everything to you.
if you want, that is.
i'm exhausted with these mind games. really tired.
i.miss.you.
i.miss.us.
i.miss.everything.abt.us.
i.doubt.i.can.say.the.same.for.you.though.
s.i.g.h.
Thursday, August 10, 2006
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- results of my boredom. got my sister to be my model while i tried out all kinda poses on her. every single pose here was directed by me, even the concepts behind the pictures. haha. the ballerina, the skeleton in the closet themed pose, the attitude gal, and of course the nerd! how fun! -
Thursday, August 10, 2006
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Wednesday, August 09, 2006
the dinner with the family! mum hates taking pictures, thus the reason why she's not in any one of them!
Wednesday, August 09, 2006
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us, over at his friend's chalet! i'm in red cos it's singapore's birthday! how patriotic! haha!
Wednesday, August 09, 2006
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and today is our very dear singapore's 41st birthday! happy birthday singapore!
din do much today. just met up with guna, headed down to one of his friend's chalet for awhile and got back home to have dinner with my family. have been too tired to do anything lately! shall post some pictures up.
till then; love love!
Wednesday, August 09, 2006
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- some of my work pieces. unfortunately, i dun have pictures of all my work. u have the birthday card, wedding and birthday guestboards and a personalised b'day package for a friend. if anyone wants to see samples, show them these yea? no pics for deco though but my b'day ones wld be a rough gauge. shall post them up later -
Wednesday, August 09, 2006
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as i was on the phone with guna yesterday, i realised that all he said was nothing but the truth. that i am being made use of and i'm allowing myself to be manipulated, despite being fully aware of it. and he thinks i'm a fool for that. yep, that's right. he said it, flat on my face. and i can't help but feel that it's true. why do i keep doing it despite repeated pleadings from close friends? argh! i just have a problem saying no and it's getting a bit too difficult to deal with. and vicky, if u are reading this u're probably waiting to knock my head, i know. u can do that the next time u see me aight?
u see, i'm fairly good in my art and craft and i must say, i am able to churn out quite a fair bit of very creative ideas, be it for a birthday surprise, v'day rendevous, xmas - u name it, i might actually have an idea up my sleeves on how you can make it a lil more special for your loved ones and most of friends, especially those from poly are aware of it. and besides that, i am handy in my art as well. i make cards for all occasion in the least typical way, most of which that are highly personalised and also crafts like, styrofoam alphabets and cartoons; u know those kind they use for birthday parties? i had orders coming in for v'day from my friends to make a gift for their boyfriends and there was a year where i ended up rushing 'orders' that i totally forget to do something for senthil. and mind you, i was NOT being paid. it was all done out of goodwill. yep, so u get the point.
so what has all these have got to do with my being a fool. i'm coming there. u see, i've got this friend in poly. let's call her x (how typical.hah). x and i were pretty close during our poly times, u know the type of friends who hang out quite often, go over to one another's place, talk thru the nights, confide in one another, seek advice for relationships and such? yes, we were rather close but over time, x changed. from the simple girl she was, she become someone else. for the better or worse i don't know but she had new groups of friends, was a committee member of some society in sch, dressed better and spoke better too and soon, i was a distant memory. i missed the times we shared but i told myself that's what happens when people become a somebody in society, they forget their past and so i consoled myself and just moved on. after all, like i've mentioned religiously, isn't change the constant of life?
but of course, when we do see one another we give one another a hug and even spare some time to say a hi or a hello and that was how it was until recently. x needed help in organising a special outing for a special someone and she came to me. said she needed me to come up with an idea on how make that occasion special and also to help with finding the perfect gifts and card. i was rather skeptical at first but later, i told myself that what cld possibly be wrong in helping someone and putting my talents to good use. after that, x sent me constant sms-es, invited me out for dinner, acknowledged my presence in MSN, called my for casual chats but somehow they will always end up going back to how my progress was for the brilliant idea i was supposed to come up with for her! i was affected. so i was needed for my services, not my friendship.
but this is only one of the few occasions i have encountered such treatment. there have been so many more out there who have done this to me. repeatedly. and i keep allowing them to do it. they wld not have seen me in mths or have bothered to have enquired abt my well-being but when they needed my help, before u know it they're all over me. men and women, all the same. yes, i have guy friends doing the same too. sheesh!
really, i do not have a problem with helping people out. i've done stuff for radhiyah for her bf's birthday, i've helped anitha with her birthday decorations and guest board, i've done retna's birthday deco as well, jay's parties, kavitha's wedding, v;day presents for almost everyone's bfs.. after all, isn't it logical to express your talents but pls, do not find me only in times of need. that can be upsetting. i don't expect this behaviour out of everyone but certainly the ones i hold close to my heart..
but then again, they are only human. and isn't this what humans are good at doing? being selfish. how can i possibly ask for more. oh well, i'm just glad i've got those precious few who are genuine around me. people like vicky, shantini, radhiyah, deepa, sivan,diyana, anitha, punitha, yanxia, charlotte, lynette, hongyan, wicky boy, just to name a few.
now that i've got that out of my chest, i've decided to heed anitha, guna and vicky's advice. i should start charging people for my ideas and whatever else i provide them with; be it decorations, guest cards, or just event planning. that wld make more sense. so readers, if you have friends who need any 'occasion' planning (haha), pls let them know abt me aight and i'll see what i can do to help. this might just be a start to my future business plan. what do you say? *winks*
Wednesday, August 09, 2006
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Tuesday, August 08, 2006
- not really the best capture of the fireworks, but it was beautiful, esp since it was with him. hehe -
Tuesday, August 08, 2006
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Sunday, August 06, 2006
yesterday was awesome. i met guna after his class at great world city. we were supposed to catch an early movie at 6 plus, have dinner and head back home after that since we were both tired and wanted some rest but unfortunately, none of the movies we wanted to catch were available at great world. so we stuck to dinner and as we were abt to leave, guna suggested gg over to esplanade for some chocolate-ty dessert at max brenners and so we took a cab down.
for some strange reason, it was more crowded than usual at esplanade and we were wondering why. i told him, it could be because of the NDP preview. as we finished our dessert and were taking a stroll down, we heard an announcement from outside fullerton that president sr nathan had arrived and he had came to grace the opening of the ' singapore fireworks festival'. hmm, how interesting. i'd heard abt the festival recently from a friend, in passing as we talking abt NDP but i nvr bothered to find out much abt it until yesterday. i witnessed it for myself. it was really beautiful and since i've only caught fireworks on tv, last night was something special. and only as we were leaving, did it occur to me that guna had actually pre-planned this all along. his intention was to bring me to esplanade to watch the fireworks from the start but he just didn't want me to know. u know, surprise?
he's amazing. always thinking of something to make my day. yes, he doesn't always spring surprises or tell me things i want to hear but when he doesn things like this at the most unexpected times, i know he loves me and i guess is should be thankful.
yes, thankful i am.
Sunday, August 06, 2006
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Saturday, August 05, 2006
- he cld have smiled AND shaved as well. and now, if he's reading this, i'm waiting to be strangled -
Saturday, August 05, 2006
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- that's us after the play -
Saturday, August 05, 2006
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the play - was AWESOME.
vishnu - was AMAZING.
wad else can i say? it was one of the best tamil plays i've ever been to. 'Ullae Velliye' - direct translation, 'Inside, Outside'. In this play, you u'll witness a chain of real-life incidents abt men who silently suffer inside while living a convincing facade on the outside.
There were 3 main stories in this play. One men who was torn between his mum and his wife, another who had a shameful past but had since turned over a new leaf but is not given an opportunity in the society, esp by women and lastly a men, who had been cheated by his love of 3 years and how that changed his life.
an excerpt:
1st character: Harichandran, a playboy by chance, meets some 'interesting females' who are much more open that he thought. hoping for a steady relationship, hari chooses to change his promiscious ways. physical pleasure takes precedence over morality for several teenage girls these days. promiscuity and proclivity towards extra marital affairs have gradually increased among several married women. are barriers being broken?
2nd character: Gurumoothy, is torn between his wife's pettiness and his mother's insecurities. using their own weaknesses as their weapons and guru's weaknesses as their strengths, the ladies whom guru loves the most manipulate his emotions. who will he neglect and who will he appease?
3rd character: Surya, struggles to satisfy Sudha's unreasonable needs, while coping with his own needs. she puts herself first and expects him to dance to her tune. does the tune change? or.. who is the most dependent? the charmer or the snake?
- men are suffering in silence. gone are the days, where women were abused. men these days, have taken over the role of the weaker sex. how far is this true? - this is the gist of the entire play.
now u wld have a clearer picture of the play and i'm sure those who went to watch it, wld agree with me. that it was indeed a very good, eye-opener to a lot of things. and my friend, vishnu who played the role of 'surya' did an amazing job! i repeat a-m-a-z-i-n-g! although some of the content was rather embarrasing (the play's got a rating of NC-16), it was a very good potrayal of women these days. gone are the days when women were the shy and conservative ones. wrong doings are blind to gender, lust is equal in both men and women and parents have to realise how far some daughters are willing to go. many parents claim that they know their children, but do they really? this is the questions, many have to ask them selves. i loved the play, as u can see cos i keep going on and on abt it... i'm definitely looking forward to more such plays which has such deep insights embedded in them...
so much for a friday night.
Saturday, August 05, 2006
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- me, charlotte and aaron, over at guthrie house, gelato -
Saturday, August 05, 2006
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finally! i had met charlotte and aaron too (her bf)! yay! she is back again but not before long she'll be leaving and to make matters worse, on my birthday! it's a rather short break this time ard for them as they had spent a month of their holidays in the states, virginia to be exact for their hospital attachment afterwhich they had travlled down to new york and washington dc for a week of shopping before heading back to singapore. yes, how envious eh? charlotte's having her time of her life, i tell you and having your boyfriend in the same uni, same country and right beside you makes matters awhole lot better too! some people have all the luck eh? haha but charlotte deserves all this and more for she is the most nicest perseon i've ever known since the tender age of 6. yes, we've known each other forever! and aaron, i dun think there's anyone better for her than him. it's their first relationship for both and i hope they make it to the marriage altar.
sigh, she's been over at glasgow for a gd 4 years already. 2 more years left before she finishes her medicine programme and becomes a full-fledged doctor but even then she won't be back yet. she intends to practice in uk itself for some years before both aaron and her decide to come back to get married. well that's good but that also means it''ll be ages before we have a proper hangout session and more of each other. * sad, sad*
anyway, aaron was so deprieved of singaporean food that the moment we met, all he wanted to do was eat, eat and eat. we ordered roti prata, briyani, tahu goreng, murtabak and mee siam, all at one go!!! we were totally full by the time we gobbled everything down and if that wasn't enough, charlotte wanted ice-cream and ice-cream we had. after some time, aaron had to leave and so char and i went down to bugis to get a few tops for her new hospital shifts and headed home early for i had a play at jubilee hall to catch, later that evening. i'm meeting the two again next week for more food and this time, it's at lau pa sat! can't wait!
Saturday, August 05, 2006
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Thursday, August 03, 2006
i have got the sudden urge to get married.
yes, that's right.
m.a.r.r.y.
i've always wanted to get married, give birth to an entire football team and spend the rest of my life with my husband running after them. and then i deleted the entire idea away from my mind the moment my relationship with senthil ended. and with guna, the feeling never came, maybe because my hopes and dreams had been dashed once and i was just too afraid to be disappointed again or maybe because being together with someone for only 6 mths and ideas of marriage simple didn't gel. u know, it's like ridiculous or something?
until last night.
after my shopping spree with anitha and a few others we met along the way, i went for my tuition afterwhich guna came to send me back home. and that's where it all started. we ran into a friend of his. he was 21, married and had a kid of 13mths. maybe it was common for malays to get married quite young, maybe it was for reasons tt i'm assuming or for reasons as simple as love but whatever the reason was, really didn't matter last night as i witnessed the most beautiful scence with my very own eyes. there he was, the guy holding on to the pram and his wife (a very pretty looking malay girl, ard our age) playing with their daughter (one of the cutest kid i've seen) in the playground near admiralty mrt station and what tugged at my heartstrings was the fact that they seemed so happy. and contented. and for a moment i wish i too was like them.
i've always been ambitious. i needed to get a house of my own, a car, earn big money, establish a career, be a somebody before i thought of settling down with a family but last night, i was wondering if the above mentioned are necessary for a happy life. does monetary security equate to happiness? or wld being with the one you love and building a home still bring you happiness and contentent even if you didn't have the 5Cs? and i realised that the answer varies among different individuals. at the end of the day, it depends on what type of person you are and what u value more - the materialistic aspects of life or the finer things in life like family bonds, relationships and love. many of which u can't measure.
so really, what is ur take?
u know, i thought i knew what i wanted all along but really, a simple incident like yesterday made me realise that i am still undecided. i am still not sure of what i want. and what i'd always thought was essential for a successful life wasn't exactly right but like i've said, it's all very subjective and depends on each individual but whatever it is, i hope we make the right choices.
life. it has a funny way of turning out, doesn' it?
p/s: not only did seeing the happily married couple last night make me think, i'm guessing it made guna reflect back on a lot of things too. he is one of those who never plans for anything too far out in the future for the fear of disappointment and so u wld have guessed that he never spoke abt marriage btw us at any one point of time in this 6 mths but yesterday he asked - "hey, don't u think we shld get married too? i think it'll be fun. let's do it " -
yes, it sounds really funny that way he put it, like marriage is such a simple thing but to think tt he even voiced it out, that made me smile so wide in which he replied "enna sirippu, paruppu maathiri?" wa lau, so anti-climax i tell you. but i know abt him, he was probably feeling a tad too shy and just had to say something so dumb to lighten the atmosphere.
either way, he is turning out to be a fine, young man. one, i'm learning to love beyond my imagination.
Thursday, August 03, 2006
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Wednesday, August 02, 2006
i dun think i'll be blogging anymore. i am in fact, thinking of deleting my blog cos over the years, it has brought me nothing but incessant problems and i dun think i need all these in my already-very-messed-up-life. i'm still contemplating abt it though cos it's really so hard to do it since writing has always been a medium for me to express everything i felt, u know a sense of freedom i feel when i just let my emotions flow and pen them down.. aaahhhh, WHATEVER! let's leave it here for now!
so much has been going on but nothing has been spoken abt and that is making me so much more frustrated and helpless! i am caught in the midst of something i was totally unaware of, held guilty by a friend and another who refuses to own up and despite repeated warnings i still have no freaking idea if that culprit has cleansed his/her conscience! u know, i might just go for the exchange programme thingy after all. nothing seems very bright in SIM at the moment.
on the brighter side, guna started his first day at sch yesterday and i was more than excited at the new chapter of his life. i met him after work, had dinner and sent him off to his campus. just my way of showing i cared and tt i am gonna be there each step he takes. i was way more anxious and excited than he was and for a moment i cldn't help but feel like i was the mother of a 6yr old, whose having his first day of school. i got guna a pencil case with almost all the stationary he wld ever need, several files, fullscap paper (is tt how u spell it?), calculator and what not. i think the only thing i left out was a school bag and water bottle. hahahaa! yes, sivan i am motherly after all, aren't i? since the whole world thinks so, i thought i might as well live by it *grinz*
and the next happy news is that my favourite person in the whole wide world (besides my daddy, of course) is back from glasgow!!! yes, yes, yes C-H-A-R-L-O-T-T-E is back and i really, really, really can't wait to see her on friday. we're going for a roti prata hunt and some very delicious ice-cream for lunch and have almost every local dish possible for dinner over at lau pa sat! that poor girl surely missed her local delights! sheesh, i missed her like so much and although we were constantly updating our lives to one another thru MSN and emails, it was never really enough. when has cyberspace ever been enough anyway?! friday, here i come!
and for now, i'm watching my all time fav 'one tree hill' and drooling at chad michael murray at the same time *swoon*. and i need to get my ass outta the hse to meet anitha in orchard at 2pm, so ciao people!
Wednesday, August 02, 2006
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